The scene that follows features the first appearance of the masked hero himself.
RANDOLPH HITLEAR and PERCIVAL P. PESTT are engaged in heated conversation on the outskirts of the Clayfoot reservation
PESTT: Yes, Mr. Hitlear, the Sheriff is still alive. That saloon chanteuse found him in the desert and I assume she brought him back to town. I tried to stop her but I had an unfortunate close encounter with a cactus.
HITLEAR: Well, that just takes the mint right out of my julep. How could you allow a member of the weaker sex get the better of you? What kind of man are you?
PESTT: Well, I’ve been sick…
HITLEAR: And you are about to have a relapse if you don’t settle this matter for me. Ashley! Rhett!
ASHLEY/RHETT: (entering together) Yessir!
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| From the Palace Showboat Theatre production |
HITLEAR: One of you hand Mr. Pestt here a firearm.
(ASHLEY hands PESTT a pistol.)
ASHLEY: Here ya go, Percy. That thar’s the Sheriff’s gun.
HITLEAR: Ride back into town and put a bullet in Sheriff Ryan’s heart with his very own weapon. It’s rather poetic, don’t you think?
PESTT: It doesn’t even rhyme. I’m no hired gun. Besides I have to take an early stage back to Washington.
HITLEAR: (hands PESTT a wad of bills) Considered yourself hired.
PESTT: Well, I suppose the P in Percival P. Pestt now stands for Pistolero!
HITLEAR: Every man has a price. Some just happen to be bargains. Just watch where you’re waving that firearm around, Wyatt Earp. Return when the job is complete. The boys and I have a date with a mountain of gold.
(All three exit as PESTT counts his money.)
PESTT: With all this cabbage, I could make cole slaw.
ROGUE: (off-stage voice over) Count your blood money slowly, Indian agent.
PESTT: (startled) Oh my land! What was that?
ROGUE: Percival P. Pestt!
PESTT: Who…who…who’s there?
ROGUE: It’s not Western Union!
PESTT: What do you want with me?
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| Inspiration for THE ROGUE. Duh. |
(THE ROGUE appears from the opposite direction PESTT is speaking toward. He is masked and is dressed all in black with gold trim.)
ROGUE: Justice!
PESTT: Oh my stars and garters! Who in the blue blazes are you?
ROGUE: I am The Rogue.
PESTT: P....p…pleased to meet you. My name is…oh, you know that already. (pulls gun) Aha! I have you now! D…d...don’t move or I’ll sh…sh…sh…
ROGUE: Shoot?
PESTT: Yes!
ROGUE: I was hoping that’s what you meant.
PESTT: I mean it! I’ll fill you full of l...l...lead! (THE ROGUE spins his finger about as the pistol turns in PESTT’s hand with the barrel facing toward him now) What was I saying?
ROGUE: Don’t move or you’ll shoot.
PESTT: It’s just a figure of speech!
ROGUE: Hand that pistol to me before you hurt someone.
PESTT: Like me! (hands pistol to ROGUE) How...how may I help you, Mr…?
ROGUE: As I said, I am The Rogue and I demand answers. Where is the man known as Randolph Hitlear?
PESTT: I think he’s on vacation. That’s it. He went to the seashore.
ROGUE: I demand the truth!
PESTT: Don’t hurt me! I’m allergic to pain! I’ll tell you! He’s in the mountain up ahead. He said he was breaking through to the Tomb of Gold tonight.
ROGUE: That is more like it. What I want you to do now is to walk all the way back into town and lock yourself in a jail cell for all your deceitful crimes of lies and bribery. You will stay until you are told otherwise. Do you understand?
PESTT: Loud and clear!
ROGUE: Double-cross me and you will suffer the wrath of The Rogue! I’m off! (exits) Ride the wind, Avenger! (horse whinnies and gallops off)
PESTT: Gone? Good! I’m getting the hey out of here. (turns to run off in opposite direction)
ROGUE: (reappearing before him) Going someplace?
PESTT: (jumping) Arghh! Just taking a short cut…Oh my kidneys…(exits opposite as ROGUE disappears)
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